~ by Matthew Toth
Oh please let me open my eyes,
let me embrace the beauty
of these sherbet skies
I’m chained and battered,
all I know is cries,
I try to speak truth but out comes lies,
In prison behind bars, cold wet,
no windows, no stars,
Dark skies, I wish the pain would end,
I pray I never again open my eyes,
I guess I’ll never witness the beautiful sherbet skies,
Others speak of these wondrous things, why can’t I see them, where do I begin, Each day I wake I swear to heaven,
that today I change, but I always give in, This endless pattern, this vicious cycle, today will be different, but first…
one more high, tomorrow I will begin.
Oh my god, I did it again,
I promised myself the time would end.
I’m a slave to my drugs, they own me now, My inner demons are on the prowl.
The sherbet skies I hear are gorgeous,
but I hide from sun because its tortuous.
I hide from love because I can’t,
I hide from life because because I welcome death.
Maybe if I took my life,
maybe if I would just die,
maybe heaven holds sherbet skies.
I wake up again, all I know is pain, inside it’s storming, all around is rain.
Please god help me! Hear my cries,
please just show me these sherbet skies.
I need your help, I need separation,
then one day came desperation.
A gift from god, a new awaken,
a chance at life, a new beginning.
I woke one day in pain and agony,
I cried to God, brought to my knees.
I begged for help, show me a sign!
Please break the chains,
let me regain what’s mine.
A journey started with more pain and cries,
and then one morning came sherbet skies. Today I welcome life, I face my pain,
and day by day my suffering drains.
I am a survivor, I am returning to self, finding that happiness does not lie in wealth.
Today I wake and open my eyes,
filed with compassion,
I can hear your cries.
Walk with me friend,
please just try,
and let’s both enjoy the sherbet skies…
Written by Matt Toth; shared at LCRA Art Walk Event 2017 – Downtown Lancaster city